Have you ever heard the saying that you're the average of the five people you spend the most time with?
It doesn't matter whether or not you agree, to this degree of specificity, on the math of how our relationships impact us, no one can deny how important the relationships we cultivate are to how we act and perceive the quality of our lives.
The relationships we choose (yes, choose) dramatically influence both our personal and professional lives — from family connections to career-based networks, the people who surround us often shape our destiny ... and our ability to move beyond our default.
Sometimes the most profound connections begin with a spark, as George points out in this thoughtful conversation.
⚡ Related: Cultivating a Relationship with Ourselves to Unlock Our Inner Power
A subtle feeling, a shared moment, or an unexpected encounter. These sparks can potentially ignite fires of opportunity, growth, and connection that we might not have foreseen. On the other hand, sometimes we can cultivate the wrong types of relationships, hang on to connections long past their expiration dates, or lapse into periods of self-imposed isolation.
How do we cultivate the right types of relationships in our lives, and when do we know when it's time to walk away? These are just two of the life-shifting questions we explore in this week's episode.
Why are the relationships in our lives so important to this idea of living beyond your default? Aren't we in control of our own destiny?
How do we effectively evaluate the quality of relationships we have today?
What do we know when we know it's time to walk away from a connection? (George shares his own powerful experiences with this challenge.)
What are the time-tested methods for nurturing meaningful connections that foster personal and professional growth?
What are the mindset shifts we need to make to navigate relationships with clarity and purpose?
What are core communities and why do they matter?
"Perceived partner responsiveness is a core feature of close, satisfying relationships. But how does responsiveness originate? Can people create relationships characterized by high responsiveness, and consequently, higher quality relationships? We suggest that goals contribute to cycles of responsiveness between people, improving both people’s relationship quality. The present studies examine 1) how interpersonal goals initiate responsiveness processes in close relationships, 2) the self-perpetuating nature of these processes, and 3) how responsiveness evolves dynamically over time through both intrapersonal projection and reciprocal interpersonal relationship processes.
In a semester-long study of 115 roommate dyads, actors’ compassionate and self-image goals predicted a cycle of responsiveness between roommates, occurring within weeks and across the semester. In a 3-week study of 65 roommate dyads, actors’ goals again predicted cycles of responsiveness between roommates, which then contributed to both actors’ and partners’ relationship quality. Results suggest that both projection and reciprocation of responsiveness associated with compassionate goals create upward spirals of responsiveness that ultimately enhance relationship quality for both people."
"American culture places a high premium on romantic love. In fact, relationship woes—or the lack thereof—are among the top reasons people seek therapy. And while romance can be a meaningful part of life, the benefits of friendships should not be overlooked.
Psychological research suggests that stable, healthy friendships are crucial for our well-being and longevity."
"It’s no secret that the quality of your friendships has an impact on your well-being. Research has shown that the quality of your friendships can influence your level of stress, physical health, and the way in which you cope. A good friendship can have positive effects on your well-being and your health, whereas a friendship with a lot of ups and downs can negatively impact your stress level and health.
If you have been friends with someone for a long time, you may feel obligated to continue to maintain the friendship despite a growing discomfort or knowledge that you no longer feel aligned with this friend. What can make ending a friendship even more complicated is that there is no protocol for ending a friendship. Unlike a romantic relationship, a friendship breakup is something you never think will happen to you until it does."